We’re in the final months of 2023. Where has the time has gone? Santa Claus is literally in town! Emotions are mixed. On the one hand; excitement, because December is the best time of the year. The bells and holly; Christmas carols and presents; and for those in the more enchanting parts of the World (upper case “W” for emphasis) – snow, lights, and all things festive! Yet, on the other hand; daunting, because of the thought of having to account for the year that’s been. Because whether you like it or not, it’s time to take stock. Did you achieve everything you set out to this year? Are you a better version of yourself?

Let’s face it. While 2023 has been a year of consistent fruitfulness and progress for some; with increase, multiplication, success; prosperity; promotion; and expansion. The reality has been the complete opposite for others; rough and tough, up, and down. With many lows, frustrations, failures, disappointments, losses, and struggles.

The same World. In the same country (South Africa, for me). In the same year (2023). Faced with the same systemic issues: the same prime lending rate (8%, as at today); ruling party (African National Congress); load shedding crisis (currently swinging between Stage 5 and Stage 6, with up to 12 hours in the dark per day); economic policy (focused on sustainable development and the creation of a strong economic base through tariff liberalisation, prudent fiscal policy, investment in infrastructure, education, land reform, and lower inflation); oil prices (crude at c$77); inflation rate (currently 5.90%); unemployment rate (32.6%); etc. Hearing the same word on the street. Reading the same news reports. Dealing in a World rebirthed in the aftermath of the Covid-19 pandemic. Yet completely different experiences.

This month, we unpack the thought more deeply. Why certain experiences that break one person are the source of another person’s promotion. Why some are struggling while others remain on a continued upward trajectory. Why many are getting poorer while others keep getting richer. Why some are impoverished and literally fighting to survive, while others enjoy an abundance that could, in earnest, be shared by many.

At a high level, which is as far as we’ll go, the answer turns on where one is located. That is, the place where one is found. And by this, I don’t mean one’s physical location. Though it may be relevant in the overall analysis. Being whether you’re in Africa or America, the suburbs, or the locations, etc. But rather, the place where one’s heart is both established and consecrated. Being the place from which the person defines his thought and speech patterns; the consciousness that he carries (which inevitably becomes the sub-conscious leading); and the voices and sounds that the person hears (last month’s blog on Noise breaks this down nicely, and I would encourage you to read it). Which then become food for the persons’ soul and the bread by which he or she lives.

Let’s get into it!

Whether you’re conscious of it or not, we’re each located somewhere, both spiritually and physically. Though, firstly spiritually. Although that’s a conversation for another day. And it’s a place. A realm. Based on the vision you have of life. And the voices that speak into your life. All of these being the things that define your world (lower case “w” for emphasis). Understand this. Every person walking the face of this earth is located in their own world. And while there may be similarities across worlds – between your world and my world, due to shared commonalities or interests; every person is still in their own world. Even when we may appear to agree, we can’t truly be agreed because it’s not known from where the other person is affirmed. It would be an error to assume that we’re all in the same place because of what is seen physically. The cars we drive, houses we live in, schools our children attend, holidays we take, and pictures we post on social media; will deceive you.

Now, this is a wonderful thing. And the reason why every other day, we’re encouraged and motivated to chart our individual courses in life as we shape our destiny. To change our worlds and define our places in the World. Because in your world, you’re king or queen. You’re both creator and actor. You get to decide how far you’ll go. And you get to dabble in the liberties available to you.

Unfortunately, many don’t see things this way. Rather, they assume that we’re all in the same world; functioning from the same place; driven by the same assumptions; and working off the same base. And this is the reason for the many divisions in the World today. Undue expectations are placed on men that everyone is in the same world and sees things the same. Yet everyone has their own lens through which they’re doing life. Moreover, it’s  possible to be many things to many people because the circumstances demand it. That is, to behave in a similar manner, or to support particular causes, for the sake of a greater purpose. Because sometimes, to relate with people, you must deal with them as they are, and not as you are. And one would err to assume that we’re in the same world because of it.

I believe that if we all understood this, the World would be more united. Because each person would own his own his individual space, and would have no reason to compete or fight with any other person for their defined spaces. Even if two were found to be doing the exact same thing in the exact same place and at the exact same time, they wouldn’t regard each other as competitors. Simply because their respective worlds are still separate. Each person is walking in his lane and minding his business. And there’s no prospect of crossing lanes because that would require you getting into that persons’ heart. The secret place that only God has access to.

But imagine this. And this is the point that I would like to emphasise in this month’s blog. You think in a particular way, talk in a particular way, and act in a particular way. You’re convinced that you’re in the right place. And perhaps even that many are found there with you. Yet, in truth, you’re located in the wrong place. Your mindset and beliefs are wrong. Your character is flawed. Your perspective of the self is skewed. Your eyes of judgement are imbalanced. Your speech is negative. Your thoughts are twisted. Yet, you don’t even know that you’re in the wrong place. You’ve shaped your life and, consequently, your world from this place. And you believe it’s working. And no one can tell you otherwise. You’re right and everyone else is wrong. Essentially doing life indifferent and ignorant.

And we can take this to another level. Take marriage, as an example. The two became one with the exchange of vows and rings. However, this was only in the flesh. Not in the spirit. Because it’s not possible for human spirits to become one. So, the man who is in his world, and the woman who is in her world, come together and create a world. Which is in the World. Three worlds in one home – excluding the children. On the surface, it looks functional. They share a surname, home, children, bank account, insurance policies, bills, responsibilities in the home, etc. But at the core, the husband has his way of life, and the wife has hers. The two don’t match. Their individual worlds were never aligned from the beginning. As a result, the two don’t function as one. They’re divided on many key aspects. And left unattended, this could lead to a breakdown of the marriage. With both parties left wondering what happened.

Sadly, many live these realities.

And how do I know this? It’s in the fighting and cheating and competition and compromising that we see every other day. The backstabbing and back-biting, the hypocrisy and lies, and the wars. The crying and complaining. The blaming and lack of accountability. Juxtaposed with the successes and wins that certain people continue to enjoy. How some just keep getting bigger and better and richer and faster and stronger and more prominent.  

How then do you help the person that’s found in the wrong place? Make him understand that you need to change location if things are to change? And how do you make the person understand that the circumstances you face don’t define or limit you? That you’re your only limitation? And what will become of this World – it’s already going in all kinds of directions; simply because our individual worlds are out of course?

How do we begin such a conversation?

Yours in baking,

Chi